Doilies and Tea Parties

[lil_tanuki]

[Well when one had an unexpected houseguest, one broke out the drinks and food. At least that's what Hayate was doing for one Nathan who had appeared in her house, connected to her with a red string.

Well she did kind of like older men, even if he was a bit of a potty mouth.]

How do you like your coffee? I think we also have some beer the last time I had a visitor over.

Comments

[thats_brutal]

[what... What is this even? Seriously? What. The fuck. Is his life right now?]

Black. [like his soul wait did she mention booze?] Beer sounds... Yeah... I need booze. Like... A lot of booze. [pause] this is ***ing stupid.

[lil_tanuki]

[Welcome to Nanohaverse, population three kids, one of them sporting giant pink lasers! She nodded and wheeled over to fetch it. Good thing she had a significant liquor cabinet. Or at least moderate.]

All right, it'll be ready in a moment. Have a seat!

[Fortunately there's plenty of room on the string. So far at least.]

I'm so sorry lol

[thats_brutal]

[It didn't seem possible for his frown to get any deeper yet, somehow, it does. He glares at the chair as if willing it to explode or burst into flames or something. Unfortunately it does not. He's stuck there... with a little girl... in a wheelchair.

How the fuck could this get ANY worse?

He sighs and sits down heavily in the chair]

You're not gonna ****ing die are you?

[You know, like kids in wheelchairs usually do.]

hahaha XD

[lil_tanuki]

[Wheeling over, she holds out the cans for him to take.] I... probably. I don't know if my illness will get better.

Re: hahaha XD

[thats_brutal]

[He takes the cans, downing one of them in one go and dropping it on the table. He regards her for a moment, still holding the second can.]

So... what the ****'s wrong with you?

[So tactful, Nathan]

[lil_tanuki]

Not too sure. The doctors can't find out why my legs are paralyzing.

[thats_brutal]

So you can't feel anything? Like... If someone stabbed you in the leg. You couldn't... Couldn't feel that?

[lil_tanuki]

I probably could at this point, it's not that bad. But my muscles don't react well in the vein of walking.

[thats_brutal]

So you can feel shit but you can't walk? [he sighs, pausing for a long moment as he takes a sip of his beer]

That ****ing sucks.

[lil_tanuki]

Tell me about it. It's frustrating to be honest, and I dunno if I'm going to get better.

[thats_brutal]

[cue awkward silence as he frankly doesn't know what the fuck he's supposed to say. Uuuuuuhhhhhhh right.

He sips his beer and looks rather perturbed... which is pretty much his default look actually]

[lil_tanuki]

But it's not that bad to be honest. I get a lot of care and I've been meeting people.

/SOBS INTO HANDS

[thats_brutal]

But... don't you wanna, you know, walk and ****? I don't think... I don't think I could live if I couldn't walk. Like... I'd ****ing kill myself.

/pats XD

[lil_tanuki]

I'd like to walk. Hopefully one day I'll be able to do. I can kind of walk, but it takes a lot of effort.

[thats_brutal]

Kind of? What's "Kind of" mean?

[lil_tanuki]

My friends made a wish and some of my disease went into remission. I can walk but with really big effort on my part.

[ninjamanager]

[Charles just .... squints at the monitor.

SO MUCH SQUINTING.]

Nathan.

Nathan, get back here, you have a gig tomorrow.

[lil_tanuki]

I'd love to give him back, but he's connected to me. [And she holds up her pinky with the string. At least it's a good length so that she doesn't have to be, say, carried by Nathan.]

[thats_brutal]

[Nathan is currently glaring at the string tied around his own finger]

Uh, Charles, If you can find a way for me to to get back there I'd really really ****ing like to hear it.

[No, really, do you SEE this place? He wants to go hooooome.]

[ninjamanager]

I haven't quite got the resources for that yet. It's harder than it looks. You might have better luck asking someone where you are. .... In the meantime, ah.....

Try not to accidentally decapitate anyone. Or set anything on, er. Y'know. On fire. Can you do that for me? Nathan?

[lil_tanuki]

I'll make sure he doesn't Mr. Manager!

[thats_brutal]

[He gives Charles a looooooooooooong look. See? SEE what he has to put up with?!

SAVE HIM.


NOW.



REALLY.


DON'T MAKE HIM SAY PLEASE.]

Is this like the not punching people in the face thing?

[ninjamanager]

It is exactly like that, yes. Think of this as a cross-dimensional PR gig. You're there to make the band look good. And if you, ah .... let me put it this way: if you **** up, I can't clean up after you there like we do after William. We clear?


[to Tanuki] Thank you, but you can call me Charles.

[lil_tanuki]

[All the intent flew over Hayate's head as she nodded.] Got it! Charles it is.

[thats_brutal]

[He twitches at the mention of Murderface. Fucking douchebag always fucking things up for the rest of them. Why the hell is he in the band, anyway, it's not like he actually DOES anything. Or, you know, is USEFUL. No one even likes the asshole. He just takes up space, breaks shit and eats all of their food.

Asshole.

Wait, wasn't Charles trying to make a point? Whatever, couldn't have been THAT important.]

Yeah yeah whatever.